Here's my Theology of Creationism and Work for Religions class...

Life is work. From the first breath a newborn takes to the very last we utter when we die, we are working. Faith becomes the first lesson we learn outside the womb and is the most enduring tool we are given as we stumble through life trying to both understand and reconnect with our Creator. As a newborn, we are forced to have faith that we will (or will not) be fed, held, cleaned, nurtured and loved. This lesson in faith is the first of many that will establish a foundation for a later time when we can discern what our purpose is here in this life. We work to come into this world initially and as we grow, we begin to learn how the faith we have sustains the work we do and eventually becomes the basis of our personal relationship with God and a theology of work.
Work is inevitable. It is merely the physical, emotional or mental effort we exert that produces some kind of product (Humphrey, 2010). Without work, we would atrophy physically, emotionally and spiritually. A career is what we state at the far end of our lifespan as a descriptor of how we spent the majority of our life's work. Vocation is the work that calls to each of us from somewhere beyond our comprehension. Vocation can be considered a calling or a purpose that produces works and helps to strengthen our relationship with our Creator (pg. 2).

Contemporary Perspectives
We ultimately spend our time doing the things which are most important to us.

Tom is a 46 year old father of six who has spent more than three decades working in exchange for financial stability and other worldly constructs. He explained work to be, “doing a job that you get paid for”. His demeanor and presence suggested a great disdain for work because he viewed it as a task that is necessary to support his family and because, “it’s just what you do”.
We spoke briefly about many other types of activities that Tom engages in and tried to fit those into his definition of work. Although he was reluctant to acknowledge extracurricular activities as “work”, the very mention of these tasks produced a great sense of pride within him. When Tom isn’t at his job with a local phone company, he is a foster parent to teenage girls, biological father of four younger children, Scout Master, and is active within his children’s Parent-Teacher Association and our church (Phillips). These are all tasks that Tom doesn’t receive a salary for. His devotion to these other roles could signify them as a possible alternative career because of the amount of time dedicated to these tasks. The respect and love he receives from the community who benefits from the work Tom puts into their youth is substantial and fulfilling. Unfortunately, because they are not money producing tasks, he doesn’t easily accept them as either substantial work or a lucrative career. Perhaps, Tom is working toward a vocation he has yet to fully define?
Dorothee Soelle expresses how even the most desirous of types of work can become mechanisms of torture in her book, “To Work and To Love” (1984). She states if work becomes obscured by worldly objectification rather than embellished with the spirit described in both traditional Christian beliefs and the Process-based theology she adheres to, then the works become nothing more than torture (pg. 55). She reckons that many types of work such as office assistants and housewives are not performed with Godly inspiration. Therefore, they are nothing short of perpetual drudgery. I would agree that any task performed with the wrong spirit or intention is less than meaningful but, I think she is incorrect in her interpretation of what is (or is not) meaningful work.

Inability to validate all types of jobs and careers can feed the frustration and hopelessness people feel when they are living to work rather than working to live. Tom’s love has validated the efforts I have made in pursuing my vocation and he has helped me to become a person I am proud to call his equal. Although he doesn’t readily accept his works not compensated by worldly means as a possible source of vocation, I do. My career choice is to be a foster parent, an at-home parent for teenagers who do not yet have the tools they need to see their greater purpose and I couldn’t possibly accomplish this vocation without the work that Tom contributes. My hope is to help him to discern for himself the great value of the things he does for so many other people. Hopefully, I will be able to help Tom see the enormous accomplishments that he is credited with by his loved ones, his community and those lives he’s touched; rather than those which are meaningful because they merely provide a paycheck.

I have learned that we ultimately spend our time doing whatever is most important to us.

In my life this philosophy transforms the countless hours of volunteer work Tom and I accomplish into both a career and a vocation. My career is fostering because I have spent the majority of my working life doing this. My job is to meet the needs of discarded children wherever they choose to end up. The work is inconsistent, perpetual and the pay stinks. Burn out is imminent, especially when the sacrifice is the healthier joy and instant gratification I receive from time with my family. Regardless of how contemporary theorists such as Soelle feel about the value of my career, I know that when I am in the service of my family, I am only in the service of my God.

Six in one hand, a Half Dozen in the other
“ Lead me, guide me, walk beside me. Help me find the way” ~I am a Child of God

While documenting my interpretation of “On Human Work”, I found reassurance from the familiarity between my own LDS/Mormon beliefs and the Catholic ideals. Whatever it is in the human condition that deters us from seeking out unfamiliar doctrine and drives us to invalidate another’s religious texts was immediately squelched when I read Pope John Paul II’s Salutation from the Encyclical letter, “ On Human Work”. Although the diction was unfamiliar, the message was easily interpreted and confirmed within my own belief systems. “ On Human Work” offers many parallels between the Catholic perspective about the work ethic of man and my own which are deeply rooted within the core values of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormon).

“ Through work man must (1) earn his daily bread and contribute to the continual advance of science and technology and, above all, to elevating unceasingly the cultural and moral level of the society which he lives in community with those who belong to the same family” (Salutation pg. 1).

His Excellency describes work as, “a perennial and fundamental” task that requires constant attention and continuously renewed witness because of the ever changing questions and scenarios that our evolving society provides (Introduction pg. 3). I agree that the questions are changing at an extremely high rate of speed and intensity. Therefore, constant attention and a daily, if not hourly renewal of witness is needed to remain true to our personal convictions. This advancement of society is one of the greatest reasons why my roots remain so grounded within The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Latter-Day simply refers to the ideal that a living Prophet is available to us and can help guide us through the issues we face today.

The existence of modern day prophets is a highly disputed point between the Catholic Church and that of the LDS Church because many people argue about a great Apostasy and whether the biblical vocation of Prophet has been removed and restored to the earth. Whether an Apostasy has occurred or is yet to occur is arguable but not necessary to explain why we work today. But it is important to understand that I think God is still guiding man and man is still seeking their relationship with their Heavenly Father in much the same way as we always have. Therefore, it is of equal importance to understand both the historical expectations of human work and the revelations given to guide us through our work in these ‘Latter Days’.

“On Human Work” outlines a great and fruitful history of the need to work for our community, our families and ourselves. In his Excellency’s words, he has demonstrated how he fulfilled his own vocation as a great and insightful leader to members of the Catholic Faith during his time on earth. The most significant difference I found between “On Human Work” and corresponding LDS doctrine is “On Human Work” seems to be a call to action whereas the LDS Leaders have designed a system of action.

My interpretation of LDS doctrine regarding work reflects a similarity of the importance for man to pursue and seek out work and vocation. Mormons refer to “vocation” as a “calling”. I was raised to see work as the only means to reach both self sufficiency and exaltation throughout life. As a Mormon, work begins at an early age and is preparatory for a lifelong desire to produce both fiduciary stability and spiritual progression. Willingness to work, simply because I am called to do so, is the type of work that sustains my vocation and furthers my relationship with Heavenly Father. Very few callings in my church are paid positions and quite often we hold several callings (vocations) simultaneously. The Catholic interpretation of vocation and the LDS expectation of calling are similar because the work is produced in an effort to advance a personal relationship with God. The manner in which our callings are discovered and sought after remain inherently different.

This difference in method for the similar greater purpose is something I am grateful for. I am grateful that our Heavenly Father has chosen many worthy, inspired individuals as avenues to reach all of His children. Whether we feel the pull of some greater purpose from beyond or we merely accept the jobs that our spiritual leaders reveal to us, the purpose is Divine. God gives us many ways to pursue our vocation with constant regard to our unique circumstances and set of weaknesses.

I hear Pope John Paul II’s message about the perennial and fundamental dimension of work as clearly as I hear the LDS Prophet’s similar proclamations and I agree with his encyclical about these key points:
1. I affirm work to be a fundamental and transitive activity while we reside on Earth (Section II).
2. The ideal that work must be ordered to meet the original purposes God intended, and then meet the worldly desires of capital and fiduciary sustenance of man as well as providing for the continued dominion by man over the Earth also applies to my discernment of vocation (pg. 16).
3. His Excellency’s affirmations of the subjective and objective qualities of work are completely valid. “During man’s toils, humans will reap the benefits of solidarity, unity and brotherhood between all nations of the World…” is complementary to my own belief that when I am in the service of my fellow man, I am in the service of my Lord.

Natural Truths and Common Purpose
“ Good teaching is good teaching” ~Dr. Humphrey
These bullets, I found to be some of the natural truths which are timeless and transparent to both Catholicism and Mormonism. The similarities provide comfort for a couple reasons. We as humans prioritize our lives in unique ways that meet our personal agendas. However, if we remain true to the idea that we work to meet the needs of our Creator first, and with equal effort seek out our personal needs, then we will accomplish what we deem most important and help society to thrive as well.

Another reason is because I feel mankind needs multiple paths to reach out and speak to our Creator. The different paths help many unique individuals seek out their personal relationships with God in a way that is minimally invasive and intimate. The similarities between very different religious sects present a type of natural concurrence between differing theologies. The details may be up for constant argument but this underlying set of common truths allows for coexistence, cooperation and collaboration of people who have different views. Whether a person chooses to subscribe to one faith or to convert between faiths doesn’t seem to alter these natural (inalienable) truths, like the necessity to work, as a fundamental component of Humankind. More importantly, it puts many groups of people on common ground and that helps facilitate the image of God as a loving Father and man as a member of His loving, heavenly family.

I also have a strong conviction that church leaders (whichever church) are ordained by a Supreme Being because of their works and contributions that are strictly for the betterment of others. Many leaders, no matter how we address them with our earthly names and languages, are privy to Devine Revelation and when that revelation is reflective across seemingly oppositional fundamentals, then it reaffirms the faith we rely upon to sustain our callings.
How do we define God?

One interesting aspect that Soelle argues is that under the premise of traditional theology, it is nearly impossible to be abundantly thankful and joyous about our creation (pg. 23). Her reasoning centers on the literal definitions she has chosen to describe God as our Maker. Soelle explains that the traditional Christian view allows for a natural segregation or spiritual gap between the shared bond of the Maker and the Made. Within her description, she determines the distance to be impassable between God and Man because man is nothing more than an object of God's affection; much like a prized vase would be to the human who created it. And, if mankind is forever separated from God, then a theology of work would be a fruitless pursuit.

I understood this to mean that God’s contributions which created mankind could motivate man to work; but is ultimately meaningless because there is no possible circumstance in which man can overcome the class-like separation between himself and his Maker.

Soelle offers an alternative view from the Traditional Christian theology which allows this spiritual gap between heavenly Father and earthly Son to be slightly less overwhelming. Process theology pulls man closer to God by acknowledging that man can build a relationship with his Creator thus redefining God, not as man’s Maker but also as his Lord. God as Lord offers man a model for earthly behavior because man becomes a product of His work (pg.26). When God is defined as Lord, our survival is contingent upon how we work to show our love for Him in the manner that He shows his love and affection for all that He created on Earth. Therefore, we should create and work in the productive manner He did for us and share the reciprocal rewards of our relationship. However, I did not sense that this relationship ultimately brings man any closer to our Creator.

“ …So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them…” Genesis 1:27

My definition of the Creator is God the Father. If we are created in God’s image then I assume that I am the product of creation. I am in essence born from God and a Celestial Partner. Therefore, I believe I am the literal daughter of my Heavenly Father and Heiress to a heavenly kingdom which I am entitled to by divine kinship. I continually work toward this God-like being throughout my existence with tools such as the continuum of faith, the process of repentance, and the aggregate glory of exaltation. This belief I hold left me quite stunned and equally appalled at the negativity and lack of purpose I felt from both theologies Soelle presents.

In contrast to Soelle’s process theology and that of the traditional Christian theology regarding creation, I do not believe I was created as an object of whim and I do not see my eternal potential as anything less than everything I imagine my heavenly parents to be. I do believe I am a literal child of God the Father and I do not believe I am here on Earth because He was particularly happy with me.

According to The Book of Revelations, long before Earth was created, our souls were present at the time that Satan fell from grace and was consequently cast out of Heaven (Revelations 12:7-10). At that time, many souls chose to leave the presence of God with Satan and they were cast down to the Earth (12:9). What if, those of us that must spend time as humans are the ones who rebelled in Heaven?

If I was made in the image of God, then I believe that He loves me in the same forgiving manner that I love my children. I believe He has offered my soul a way to come back to my heavenly home similar to the journey of the Prodigal Son. And, I believe He is making me work for it. I am positive my core personality remains consistent between my mortal body and my spiritual design. Therefore, I know that I was quite possibly as much of a pain in Heaven as I am on Earth and I am worthy of forgiveness.

God gave me life. Life is work. Therefore, we must work to live and this is the work that must be done to reestablish our relationship with our Heavenly Father.
I believe God the Father to be a loving Father and I believe we can earn His forgiveness through our works on Earth. God the Father has given man many avenues in which we can grow, learn, fail and progress. All of which require work.
Spiritual tools we use to work

The Continuum of Faith
Without a more in depth understanding about what fuels Soelle’s negative criticism of the traditional theology, it is difficult to understand why one cannot exclaim, “It is very good” when we consider creation. What if Faith could be considered a belief in things that are felt, often unseen and indescribable within our primitive language base?

I do agree with Soelle that faith is bolstered by rational thought and clarity does help sustain our belief systems (pg. 23). But, I believe the very premise of faith is knowledge without any bolstering or proof. I think faith is one of the most difficult things we as children of God must work for. How much faith we have must constantly be measured because we lose it so easily. Yet, to change any hardship I am struggling with, the first thing I always have to do is work to restore my faith in my Heavenly Father. I have never had any problem with praising creation for all of its glory! I think my creation as a literal child of Heavenly Parents was eventual but the creation of my body and all that surrounds me while I am on this earth is the most glorious and loving provision a parent could give a wayward child. I have faith that I am safe from true evil, loved from afar, and trusted by God to guide my spiritual siblings along their path of redemption with our Maker via the parameters of our vocation. Creation is perfect.

The Process of Repentance
I don’t think Heavenly Father would allow Satan back into Heaven with a mere, “Sorry…” Repentance is a process that requires us to work in order to prove that we are not only sorry but willing to commit to a different path. To say, “I’m sorry” is to acknowledge that we have harmed something however, it doesn’t offer any type of repair. I believe my Heavenly Father has offered me a process where my sincere acknowledgement of wrongdoing can be totally rectified and I can once again work to further my path toward exaltation in Heaven.
First, I must admit I was wrong to the one I offended and I must ask for their forgiveness. Repentance is inconsequential of the offended person's ability to forgive my actions but I must work on building my courage to confront the affronted with a broken heart and contrite spirit. I must then ask my Heavenly Father to forgive me. I don't know why confession and prayerful acknowledgment of my faults is so much work but it is spiritually exhausting.
I must then, forgive myself. Again, the spiritual and physical work it takes to forgive ourselves when we do things that damage us spiritually is exhausting and at times almost bloodletting. Forgiveness of myself means that I must be utterly, intimately honest with myself and it is so hard.
The works God expects of us through faith and repentance require us to then, do everything in our power to not only work to make things right, but also to never do the thing again. Repentance is work but it is good hard, cleansing work. I do believe that God forgives but, I believe through the work He requires of all His children, we can grow closer to Him and earn our place in His Celestial Kingdom.

The Path to Exaltation
We will be known and judged by our works.

Nurturing faith and actively seeking repentance both require enormous amounts of work in both a spiritual and a physical sense. However, forgiveness is by far the most difficult and important work we can do while we are confined to this earthly moratorium. God, the Father, showed the Earth how much he loved us when He modeled forgiveness through the atonement of Jesus Christ. In this action, God once again set an example of how much sacrifice and work forgiveness requires. He then, gave us the means to follow His example. My interpretation of the blood sacrifice of Christ is one that inspires every form of work I encounter.
Every time I successfully forgive another being, I am working. I am building relationships, purifying myself and I am showing the closest possible human model of what God the Father is. The aggregation of all my good works is not something that can be viewed like a paycheck or social class description. But, on the eternal continuum the product of my earthly work is observed into a spiritual being who will one day be worthy of exaltation and my divine nature. When I forgive, I prove to the world that I am truly a divine daughter of God.
This is my reason to work and the philosophy which allows me to be grateful for every opportunity to work. The spirit in which we do all things, hope for things and engage our experiences is the decisive measurement of whether or not work is good.
Who am I and why am I here? What if I never make any kind of change or the change I make hurts more than helps? What if I miss my calling? These are all big questions that all of us eventually ask. Hopefully sooner than later, each of us experience either some sort of epiphany that helps us to answer at least one of the big questions or we learn the trick that mature (wise) people call acceptance when it seems we may not answer them at all. Sometimes it seems that I have all the answers but I forgot the questions. Sometimes the questions are so overwhelming that the answers seem too simple to answer the complexities of our nature. But, I found some answers once I began defining terms and sifting through the vast chiasm of my experience. Then, I began rephrasing the big questions into a language I could understand. Thus I found the beginnings of my purpose in life, my vocation.

Hierarchy of Basic Needs
God may not exist to every person, yet.

The views of people who call themselves Atheists are equally valid. But, I think their views are necessary for survival, therefore temporary. An Atheist is someone who denies the existence of God (WordNet). I think a person chooses to be known as an Atheist after they have reviewed various religions and theological perspectives and then determined that a Supreme Being has not been justified within their lives. I think that many people become Atheist not from the lack of Godlike presence in their lives but from the lack of protection and grace they feel has not been given to them in their times of dire need by a God. It isn't to be judged, merely validated.
Maslow was onto something with his Hierarchy of Needs. Abraham Maslow theorized if we are denied basic human needs, safety, and love, then how can we possibly reach a place where we can consider a higher purpose (Psychology)? Many of the children in my life have been denied most of their basic human needs during their young lives. Therefore, faith has been extinguished before it had a chance to grow.
I think the views of Atheism are not formed from the abundance of supporting evidence that proves there is no God, but from the direct denial of basic human needs which stunts the biological development needed to properly explore abstract ideas such as God. Faith in a supreme purpose is a seed that is planted in our lives. If that seed either never gets properly sown or fails to be nurtured, then it won't grow. It will wilt, fade and eventually deteriorate into extinction. Atheists have the freedom, right and supporting evidence to justify why God does not exist for/to them. I respect that right. I listen to my kiddoes when they tell me they hate God and have given up on God. I have faith to know that God can take it, He is a parent and kids get angry at their parents when they feel that their parent has failed them.
I have spent most of my professional career working with children and adolescents who have been given no Earthly reason to search for a relationship with a Supreme Being or God. After all, He is the first (heavenly) Father who let them down because He allowed them to be born into a world of pain and torment. Then, He didn't protect them from the procession of abusive parents, guardians and life circumstances that reiterated time and again that these kids were alone, abandoned, unloved and unimportant. I think I would reject that I was here because some God loved me as well.
But, Hope Remains
I also know, there is no such thing as an Atheist in a foxhole. During the time I spent serving in the U.S. Army, I spent a great amount of time cramped and huddled in a bomb shelter with mortars incoming and sirens raging. I remember wondering if the next breath I took would be laced with something that may kill me (or worse) that I might survive and be crippled by it. I remember hearing the murmuring of tears and conversations in all different levels of tone and tempo. I remember the very moment when I realized those murmurings were prayers. I remember the surprise I felt when I noticed that I too, was praying fervently to Something/Someone that I had not yet accepted as tangible.
Testimony is a person's direct knowledge of a Supreme purpose that is nurtured by faith. Faith (theoretically) doesn't require physical, empirical evidence but, it sure does help. Every one of us in that bomb shelter carried differing levels of testimony, faith and rejection. When we stared straight down Death's corridor into the pitch black unknown with mortar shells shattering everything we know as life, we all started praying not to the God we claim is either there or not there, but to the idea that maybe (just maybe) we were wrong and that some Thing just might be out there to deliver us from oblivion. Nobody's candles were snuffed out that night.

Work as a Divine Revelation
"The challenge of this pastoral letter is not merely to think differently, but also to act differently. A renewal of economic life depends on the conscious choices and commitments of individual believers who practice their faith in the world. This letter calls us to conversion and common action, to new forms of stewardship, service, and citizenship. The completion of a letter such as this is but the beginning of a long process of education, discussion, and action." -- Economic Justice for All

“Economic Justice for All” was intended to be an initial plan of action and considered the beginning process for each of us individually to engage in a “…long process of education, discussion and action” (1986, USCCB). Ten years later, the National Conference of Catholic Bishops responded to this calling with a progress report and a decade of reflection about how individuals were responding to the ten core values outlined in Pope John Paul’s initial call to action (1995, NCCBUS). These encyclicals document the responses and theological conversations between the Church leaders and consequently provide a succinct roadmap outlining the evolution of key concepts which define the theological message about economic justice.

I understand theological conversation to mean that the message given by the Pope should be received as a directional influence used to put human beings back “on track”. In regard to economic justice, I believe the Pope is calling each district leader and each individual to take action within their own lives to ensure that people, especially children, are enjoying the benefits of the enormous wealth that America has to offer.

My confusion seems to center on plan of action. A decade after, I can hear the reiteration about the need to redistribute wealth and that we each hold a personal responsibility toward the goal, but I don’t see how the Catholic Church is guiding their parishioners in specific ways of accomplishing this great work other than education and counsel.

The message about faith in man and God is strong but, I feel that the message will falter if man cannot or will not be held responsible for our own actions. Laws such as tithing and self- sufficiency are necessary to help keep people on track when they are seeking to produce meaningful work. I feel that every person has the right to free will and to choose whether or not they devote a percentage of their earnings to an organization that redistributes the wealth to those who are in need. In my experience, Tithing is not always monetary and I have come to believe that the person who gives an honest tithe will not find themselves struggling to survive. Even for those who choose not to follow any faith, I think their 'tithe' or donation can still be contributed in a manner that helps others without subscribing to a faith-based organization.

The fruits of our labor
Personal Agency

It is easy to argue theoretical approaches but it is very difficult to put the path right out in front of people because there is such a thin line between direct guidance and encroaching on a person’s free will. If that line is carefully managed, I think we would see a large number of people who are waiting for a greater opportunity to give back to their God and willing to do so by their faith and desire to grow closer to the Creator.
I come from a community where it is expected that I volunteer, hold callings, act as a teacher, and pay 10 % tithing. The unique twist that the LDS (Mormon) Church places on these things is greatly reliant on the spirit of sacrifice. I can volunteer any time I want. But, if I am to fulfill my duties as a teacher or to hold callings in the Church, I must be living by the moral codes set forth by leaders, one of which means that I be considered a full Tithe payer. Not everyone can give 10% of their income because they may or may not have income. In order to be considered spiritually prepared to work in God’s image in official church callings, I am required to give 10% of my works.

Mostly, LDS members do this without question.

Making Work into Vocation
A Road Map
The contribution of monies, goods and capital are taken in by the Church and redistributed as the leaders see fit. They are used for the welfare of both members and non-members by providing disaster relief, social services, counseling and a huge variety of other basic human needs. It is a great comfort to know that I have contributed to these resources and therefore I am not ashamed when I need to access them.
It is equally important to state that Church Welfare services are not meant to sustain lifestyle, they are meant to sustain life by creating jobs, teaching ways to become self sufficient and placing the person in close counsel with local leaders so they may learn how to maneuver within their cultural demands.
I am also required to act as a visiting teacher. This is time that I spend visiting the homes of different women (assigned by our women's leaders) to check on her emotional welfare outside of Church activities. Alternately, men are assigned to periodically check in on family units outside of Church activities to ensure that the family unit’s needs are being met.
It is strongly encouraged that the family unit remains as intact as possible with one parent at home to take care of home business and one whose work produces income to support the family. I stay home simply because my husband is better at making money than I am. But, it is an innate requirement needed to sustain my vocation to maintain my education and 'marketability' in case my husband was to lose his job.
The Catholic Church speaks about the necessity for all people to have access to jobs, education, food, etc and I agree. But, we need to give individuals greater and more specific opportunities to give back to their community in ways that go beyond paying taxes.
It seems that we as Americans spend too much time handing out fish and not enough time teaching people how to fish. We have created a society that has defined a culture of poverty. This culture of poverty includes people who are without tools to change their social structures and a society that enables these people to stay below the poverty line by not providing opportunities to education and self sufficiency and work. This is the cycle I believe the Church wishes to break but it will take an unprecedented amount of work to redefine faith and sacrifice in hopes to break the inherited cycle of poverty. It will take greater interfaith relationships. It will take enormous amounts of personal responsibility and conversations with each of us and God. Most importantly, it will take Church Leaders having faith in their personal vocations and using their divine revelations to put faith back into the people by holding people accountable for their moral and social actions.
This is huge and I don't know how to narrow it and organize it into an essay that will be received as an offering of love and devotion to the human condition. I have been learning how this system 'works' for three decades and I still don't know all the details. I know I pay tithing. I say yes when I can to callings in the Church. I help others as often as I can. I could never have done these things without the specific guidance of my religious leaders. I don’t think many could.

Conclusion
“Behold, I say unto you that because I said unto you that I had spent my days in your service, I do not desire to boast, for I have only been in the service of God.”~ Mosiah 2:16

I have tried to express my insights about why we work and how work affects my life. In that, it is important to discuss my interpretation of the purpose of creation, why we exist and how I foresee my progression throughout Eternity. I have tried to touch briefly on differing theological views including those who claim no kind of higher purpose.
Just reading this statement makes me smile because I can only imagine the very beginning of the enormity that this entails. I feel it is of the utmost importance to explain that this is just a beginning of my discernment.
To discern is to identify, define and distinguish how my views of work and creation are unique and how they are similar to the views of others. To discern is to account for how I live and why I work. This discernment begins to articulate why I believe the old adage, “To work is to live and to live is to work”.
My beginnings are founded within faith and that faith is what sustains my testimony. My testimony consists of the beliefs I have confirmed for myself by faith and the gift of the Holy Spirit. I consider this part of the Godhead to act as my spiritual representative as we converse about work. It affirms and informs me about how my theology speaks to both my religious foundations and offers me confidence; therefore bolstering my faith especially when considering contemporary views that set strong argument against both the traditional Christian theology and the LDS theology.
My hope is to further the alignment of my personal experiences and the religious principles I have been taught. I’ve found that when my life experiences and religious foundations are consistent with each other then, I am able to open the conversation to contemporary ideals and arguments that challenge my foundational beliefs.
This is the beginning of my spiritual reflection regarding the need for creation, the work we must do while we are mortal and the conversations I have between the World, Myself and my Maker.
 

References

Humphrey, R. (2010, October 19). Introduction to Work, Career, Vocation: A Theology for shaping life [Course Introduction]. Retrieved from Work, Career, Vocation: Religion 339:
Phillips, T. E. (2010, November 1). Today's Meaning of Work and Career. Interview by J. E. Phillips., .
n.d. (2010). What is Vocation? What is Discernment?. College of St. Benedict ~ St. John's University. Retrieved November 26, 2010, from: http://www.csbsju.edu/Journey/Resources/vocationwhatis.htm.
Schnurr, D. M. (1986, USCCB). Pastoral Letter on Catholic Social Teaching and the U.S.Economy. Economic Justice for All: , 99. Retrieved November 10, 2010, from United States Conference of Catholic Bishops database.
Schnurr, D. M. (1995, NCCBUS ). Continuing Principles, Changing Context, New Challenges. A Decade After "Economic Justice for All": , 99. Retrieved November 10, 2010, from National Conference of Catholic Bishops database.
Soelle, D. (1984). To work and to love. Philladelphia: Fortress press.
WordNet. (2010, October 27). WordNet: A Lexical Database for English. Retrieved December 10, 2010, from The Trustees of Princeton University website: http://wordnet.princeton.edu/
 
Appendix

Definitive meanings of my own:

Discern is to sift, sort, identify and distinguish. Discernment is the way in which we establish a literal interpretation of our divine vocation. To discern my vocation is to clarify a calling that I have received from a greater beyond into a language that I use in this earthly experience to communicate.
Vocation: The work that calls to our spiritual being and provides the continuum that allows us to evolve into the literal image of God, Our Heavenly Father. Vocation is the most pure form of our literal relationship with our Creator.
Work: Is necessary to come back to into the presence of God, The Father. All work is for the purpose of redemption, exaltation and progression toward the ability to be the creator of our own Heavenly Kingdom.
God: Pro-Creator. The Literal image of God and God is the Father.
Talents: Guiding others to learn about their own paths. My greatest talent is something like Teaching, Motivating and encouraging others to refine their talents and enable them to progress toward their own discernment.
Community Involvements: I engage wayward adolescents and children in a manner that allows them to find succor or perhaps a temporary reprieve from their circumstances. If the spirit of the volunteer is defined not by action but by willingness to serve in a given purpose, then I am a volunteer. I seek every opportunity to offer myself to this cause regardless of worldly recognition or fiduciary gain. My faith in God the Father allows me to rely on Him to provide the spirit in which I am to serve. I merely show up willing to serve.
Purpose or Meaning: I am made to seek out and identify another’s “lifework” and encourage the change they wish to be in their worlds. I am meant to serve others. “For when I am in the service of my fellow man, I am only in the service of my Lord” BOM
Relationships: Every relationship is rich with meaning and experience. Good relationships bolster faith in a manner similar to the one Soelle describes. “Bad” Painful experiences provide equal if not greater, value and meaning if I am willing to seek out the manner in which I can grow from it.
Progress is pivotal upon my familial relationships. My husband and I are bonded in cause, morality and path. My husband has chosen to provide the job which finances our greater purposes and I strive to provide the time. These relational roles are not solidified and we both work to become each other’s experts. Malleability of roles allows us; that if vocation requires us to stand in each other’s roles, we will do so and continue to progress together.
Re-Creation & Leisure: Swimming. I hate the feeling of first getting in the water. But, once I am, I feel that I cannot falter. I feel the touch of something that has the ability to touch my complete, physical body in a manner akin to the touch of the Holy Spirit that touches my entire spiritual being. This metaphor allows me to bask in the glory of creation and symbolically engage my relationship with God, The Father.
Besides the time and seclusion of the water, I seek duality in purpose because most of the time I just enjoy the moment and place where I most often engage people who define my vocation. We should strive to find that work and leisure make most tasks re-creational and pro-creational. Therefore, almost all moments in life become enjoyable and reassuring.
“0+0=something. I am nobody and nobody’s perfect. Suffer the little children because they aren’t stupid yet. When I am serving you, only then am I in the service of the lord. Humans were never meant to be saved by ignorance. Human language perverts the feelings I have about eternity because they are insufficient to articulate who I am and why I am here” JP

Critique of D. Soelle and the beginnings of my own theology of work.

My initial confusion about “To Work and to Love” is in response to Soelle’s “If” scenarios. I don’t completely understand the theological perspectives that she is critiquing. Therefore many of my critique statements may reflect my lack of knowledge about the traditional Christian theology versus those offered by the theology of progression.
It seems that Soelle’s main points of disdain evolve from the manner in which she interprets the traditional views and how she defines the main elements of creation theology. Many of the literal definitions she uses in her work seem to dismiss aspects of the traditional theology and offer support to process theology. The limitations she places on her definitions of God and faith narrow otherwise broad philosophical planes in a manner that seems to naturally support process theology as a viable alternative to the traditional views. Process theology places greater emphasis on the necessity to perpetuate a conversation between man and God thus causing progression toward an intimate relationship between man and his maker.
Both theologies provided me with a broader understanding about how many Christians view man’s relationship to and with God. However, I feel that my personal relationship with God is not defined within the parameters of either pool of thought. Perhaps, the possible definitions are as boundless and unique as the individual relationships we all have with our Maker?
The roles of God:
One interesting aspect that Soelle argues is that under the premise of traditional theology, it is nearly impossible to be abundantly thankful and joyous about our creation (pg. 23). Her reasoning centers on the literal definitions she has chosen to describe God as our maker. Soelle explains that the traditional view suggests that God, as man’s maker, allows for a natural segregation or spiritual gap between the shared bond of the Maker and the Made. Within her description, she determines the distance to be impassable between God and Man because man is nothing more than an object of God's affection; much like a prized vase would be to the human who created it. And, if mankind is forever separated from God, then a theology of work would be a fruitless pursuit.
I understood this to mean that God’s model of work which could motivate man to work, is ultimately meaningless because there is no possible circumstance in which man can overcome the class-like separation between the two beings.
Soelle then changes the definition of God as maker to God as Lord and makes an equally relevant argument in favor of process theology.
Soelle offers an alternative view which allows this gap to be slightly less overwhelming by acknowledging that man can build a relationship with his maker by the redefining of God, not only as man’s maker but also as his Lord. God as Lord offers man a model for earthly behavior because man becomes a product of His work (pg.26). When God is defined as Lord, our survival is contingent upon how we work to show our love for Him in the manner that He shows his love and affection for all that He created on Earth. Therefore, we should create and work in the productive manner He did for us and share the reciprocal rewards of a relationship. However, I did not sense that this relationship ultimately brings man any closer to our Creator.
My definition of the Creator is God the Father. If we are created in God’s image then I assume that I am the product of creation that has come from God and a Celestial Partner. Therefore, I believe I am the literal daughter of my Heavenly Father and heiress to a heavenly kingdom which I am entitled to by divine kinship. I continually work toward this God-like being throughout my existence with tools such as the continuum of faith, the process of repentance, and the aggregate glory of exaltation. This belief I hold left me quite stunned and equally appalled at the negativity and lack of purpose I felt from both theologies Soelle presents.
In contrast to Soelle’s process theology and that of the traditional Christian theology regarding creation, I do not believe I was created as an object of whim and I do not see my eternal potential as anything less than everything that I comprehend the image I have of my Heavenly parents. I do believe I am a literal child of God the Father and I do not believe I am here on Earth because He was particularly happy with me.
It’s my understanding that long before Earth was created, our souls were present at the time that Satan fell from grace and consequently cast out of Heaven. At that time, many souls chose to leave the presence of God with Satan. What if, those of us that must spend time as humans are the ones who rebelled in Heaven? If I was made in the image of God, then I believe that He loves me in the same forgiving manner that I love my children. I believe He has offered my soul a way to come back to my heavenly home similar to the journey of the Prodigal Son. And, I believe He is making me work for it. I am positive my core personality remains consistent between my mortal body and my spiritual design. Therefore, I know that I was quite possibly as much of a pain in Heaven as I am on Earth and I am worthy of forgiveness.
Life is work.
I believe God the Father to be a loving Father and I believe we can earn His forgiveness through our works on Earth. God the Father has given man many avenues in which we can grow, learn, fail and progress. All of which require work.
The continuum of Faith:
Without a more in depth understanding about what fuels Soelle’s negative criticism of the traditional theology, it is difficult to understand why one cannot exclaim, “It is very good” when we consider creation. What if Faith could be considered a belief in things that are felt, often unseen and indescribable within our primitive language base?
I do agree with Soelle that faith is bolstered by rational thought and clarity does help sustain our belief systems (pg. 23). But, I believe the very premise of faith is knowledge without any bolstering or proof. I think faith is one of the most difficult things we as children of God must work for. It seems that it is irrelevant how much faith we have, because we lose it so easily. Yet, to change any hardship I am struggling with, the first thing I always have to do is work to restore my faith in my Heavenly Father. I have never had any problem with praising creation for all of its glory! I think my creation as a literal child of Heavenly Parents was eventual but the creation of my body and all that surrounds me while I am on this earth is the most glorious and loving provision a parent could give a wayward child. I have faith that I am safe from true evil, loved from afar, and trusted by God to guide my spiritual siblings along their path of redemption with our Maker. Creation is perfect.
The process of Repentance:
I don’t think Heavenly Father would allow Satan back into Heaven with a mere, “Sorry…”. Repentance is a process that requires us to work in order to prove that we are not only sorry but willing to commit to a different path. To say, “I’m sorry” is to acknowledge that we have harmed something however, it doesn’t offer any type of repair. I believe my Heavenly Father has offered me a process where my sincere acknowledgement of wrongdoing can be totally rectified and I can once again work to further my path toward exaltation in Heaven.
First, I must admit I was wrong to the one I offended and I must ask for their forgiveness. Repentence is inconsequential of the offended person's ability to forgive my actions but I must work on building my courage to confront the affronted with a broken heart and contrite spirit. I must then, ask my Heavenly Father to forgive me. I don't know why confession and prayerful acknowledgment of my faults is so much work but it is spiritually exhausting.
I must then, forgive myself. Again, the spiritual and physical work it takes to forgive ourselves when we do things that damage us spiritually is exhausting and at times almost bloodletting. Forgiveness of myself means that I must be utterly, intimately honest with myself and it is so hard.
The works God expects of us through faith and repentance require us to then, do everything in our power to not only work to make things right, but also to never do the thing again. Repentance is work but it is good hard, cleansing work. I do believe that God forgives but, I believe through the work He requires of all His children, that we can grow closer to Him and earn our place in His Celestial Kingdom.
Aggregate my work to further my path toward exaltation.
Nurturing faith and actively seeking repentance both require enormous amounts of work in both a spiritual and a physical sense. However, forgiveness is by far the most difficult and important work we can do while we are confined to this earthly moratorium. God, the Father, showed the Earth how much he loved us when He modeled forgiveness through the atonement of Jesus Christ. In this action, God once again set an example of how much sacrifice and work forgiveness requires. He then, gave us the means to follow His example. My interpretation of the blood sacrifice of Christ is one that inspires every form of work I encounter.
Every time I successfully forgive another being, I am working. I am building relationships, purifying myself, I am showing the closest possible human model of what God the Father is. The aggregation of all my good works is not something that can viewed like a paycheck or social class discription. But, on the eternal continuum the product of my earthly work is observed into a spiritual being who will one day be worthy of exaltation and my divine nature. When I forgive, I prove to the world that I am truly a divine daughter of God.
This is my reason to work and the philosophy which allows me to be grateful for every opportunity to work. The spirit in which we do all things, hope for things and engage our experiences is the decisive measurement of whether or not work is good.
This is my theology of work.

I don't think that I am here on Earth because God is happy with Who I am.

As a parent, I have observed some things that I never could have understood as a child. Which child is usually removed from a home? The one who is obedient, kind, thoughtful and willing to accept the ground rules their parents have put in place?
It seems to me that more often, the child who is sent out (or leaves) tends to be argumentative, disrespectful & pride-ridden. I'm not passing judgment on either child, this is merely observation.
Well, it seems that most Christians believe that there was some type of war that occured in Heaven and so many souls chose to support Heavenly Father and the rest chose to follow Lucifer.
Did God really just cast out all those spirit children because they were rebellious? Really?
It seems to me that if my child were rebellious and either left home or was asked to leave, that the door would be open for there return, albeit the journey may be difficult to get back home.
I would want my child to conquer pride and anger. I would want them to live on their own without my direct guidance and I would want them to maybe suffer a little bit just to ensure they are humble and ready to come back into my graces.
But, under no circumstances would I slam the door and never give them any opportunity to learn, grow and return to our family.
Why would God?
Perhaps we are the ones who were rebellious? What if God put Earth out there in that outer darkness and ensured we had a place to go that was restrictive, humbling and removed from his direct interventions, however with faith and a couple other constructs, we would be able to either continue to reject our Heavenly status or return to His home?
Why else would we have to suffer with the things we do in this world? I hardly think it's because we were obedient and in His good graces.
I feel God's love. I know I have a purpose and a place in Eternity. I know I am here to learn many things and not to judge anyone else's choices, paths, beliefs. Because, they too, have their paths and places to grow.
I'm sure this makes me a lousy Christian. But, my faith has allowed me to hae confidence in my personal agency and accountability. My experiences has allowed me to have faith and confidence in yours as well.
Knowing who I am, I am positive beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was a bit rebellious in Heaven as well...

Why do we mourn the dead and why is it rudeto rejoice?

This week, Honey lost his Aunt to congestive heart failure. He is grief stricken and is flying back tomorrow to attend the funeral.
I always thought of death as a release from the pains of this reality. No person, no religion can encompass and articulate what comes after death because we are limited by a physical prison we call a body. Are thoughts, feeling and actions are all finite. The Creator is not therefore we cannot conceptualize what comes next.
But, anyone who has ever held a new baby, or noticed a dandelion that has forced it's way through concrete to bloom, or has laid in a foxhole with live fire going over their head cannot possibly believe that we are dead when we die and recycled back to the Earth with no further ado. Well, I certainly don't accept it.
When JerkFace (the cat) died, I was pained so much from the grief that my children suffered. When our loved ones die, I feel this well inside of me open up with an amzing amount of love and happiness for that person. They got called beyond this place. They get to know what comes next. They have gained their lessons from this life and can move on with...Eternity.
I hate saying, "Sorry for loss" or "With the greatest sympathies"...
Secretly I send flowers and I always know in my heart that they are a gift of celebration ~ perhaps graduation. They are a symbol of hope and acceptance.
Death is an ultimate acceptance. I accept this fate for me and for every other person on this planet. I know there is something else out there.
Goodbye for now May Ann. You did so much good in this world. You live on in my Honey and we will see you again soon.

This is always the hard part

My heart is broken today. There is some pain that is so vibrant and a hurt so rich that it consumes my being. My goal is to validate the pain, nurse the hurt and incorporate the experience into who I am.
My oldest son was away at camp for the past four weeks. While he was away, his cat (jerkface) was hit by a car and killed. When he came home today, we had to let him know what happened.
Jake changes so much when he goes to camp. He grows and explores new ideas and comes home with new beliefs and perspectives. This year, he came home with a much deeper voice. Oh boy, that'll have to be a post all in its own...
My husband took care of it. He told him what happened and showed him where we buried Jerkface. He told him it was okay to cry. Jake didn't cry. Well, after Tom left him alone to his thoughts, he broke down.
I hate this part. I could feel him. I could feel his sadness. I was upstairs in my room and looked out the window. He was there under the Hydrangea trees quietly weeping by himself.
I wanted to go out there and hold my baby, but I knew that wouldn't be the right answer just yet either. See, Jake is 11, almost 12. He's not a little kid anymore and I know that our relationship is about to change as well.
This part kills me. One of the things I desperately want my children to learn is self advocacy. I need for him to trust himself and come seek me out if I can help ~ or even if I can't do anything except be there.
He cried alone. He wiped his eyes and came inside. I went downstairs to make myself available to him and found him snuggling his baby brother (Zayah).
Turns out he was helping him pull out his tooth, first one he's lost.
I love this part. My son is learning to self soothe, reach out for creature comfort and seek out love and closeness. Yes, I wish it was still me to kiss away the pain, but I am more grateful that he did it in his own way.
Grief is an inevitable process. If we fight it, I think it'll warp every relationship we ever have. Sometimes we have to deny and then acknowledge that we were in denial. Sometimes we need to cry softly and then turn around and scream at the Heavens. Eventually we have to be angry when we grieve. If we don't get angry then we simply displace it and punish innocent people with our pent up rage.
I think it's okay to scream and rage at God when we are grieving. I think He can handle it ~ after all he is our Father. It's okay to be angry Jake. It's okay to cry. It's okay be sad. It's okay to deny it ever happened. It's okay to pull the blossoms from the trees and cry into their soft pedals only to rip them up and throw them to the ground. It's okay to hurt. Because we won't know how to treasure happiness, love, acceptance, beauty and all things GOOD, if we don't know the raw pain that comes from losing them.


Rest in Peace Jerkface. We love you and we will never forget you.

Dispute settlement

Best two out of three... Last one standing wins the arguement.


And of course, How do YOU catch a liar in your house? Here, we do the tongue test of honesty! I can catch who the dishonest one is by looking at their tongue... Can you figure out the real test?

Here's a Little Shel Silverstein. Ahh, His wisdom is immense

Ladies First - Shel Silverstein (A Light in the Attic)

Pamela Purse yelled, "Ladies first,"
Pushing in front of the ice cream line.
Pamela Purse yelled, "Ladies first,"
Grabbing the ketchup at dinnertime.
Climbing on the morning bus
She'd shove right by all of us
And there'd be a tiff or a fight or a fuss
When Pamela Purse yelled, "Ladies first."



Pamela Purse screamed, "Ladies first,"
When we went off on our jungle trip.
Pamela Purse said her thirst was worse
And guzzled our water, every sip.
And when we got grabbed by that wild savage band,
Who tied us together and made us all stand
In a long line in front of the King of the land-
A cannibal known as Fry-'Em-Up Dan,
Who sat on his throne in a bib so grand
With a lick of his lips and a fork in his hand,
As he tried to decide who'd be first in the pan-
From back of the line, in that shrill voice of hers,
Pamela Purse yelled, "Ladies first."

Favorite Quotes

I decided to add a section of favorite quotes. Sometimes, little sayings just capture a tiny piece of our personality. I'll add to it as I go!

I am proof that Behaviorial and Cognitive Theorists are soul sisters

So, in the past few years, I have had the opportunity to witness TFCBT (Trauma Focused Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy), DBT (Dialectic Behavior Therapy), Psycho Therapy, Person-Centered Therapy, Family-based CBT… I am therapeutically all set!
When I went through basic training, I went through the greatest behavioral alteration process I have ever encountered. A Drill Sergeant’s main purpose in life is to relieve me of every behavior that: A: Could destroy the peace, B: Kill me and C: Kill other soldiers. The process was strictly of the behavioral flavor. Deprive me of sleep and creature comforts, then raise my stress level and anxiety to new personal highs, and then allow me to fail at every aspect of my life for one week, and hopefully, my personality becomes a smooshy substance that can be shaped into that of a United States Soldier. For the most part, that worked. But, you can’t keep that ever present stable personality down for too long. Eventually, every soldier takes their new standards and incorporate their own unique qualities, traits and snafus. I will always have a soldier’s mentality in some ways. But now, I find that it is an enhancement, a facet, of the greater human~ Me.
Behaviorists have long proclaimed that we are creatures who are shaped and conditioned by our environments. Historically, behavioral theorists such as B.F. Skinner and John Watson have claimed that we are a product solely of our reactions to environmental stimuli. In regards to personality, a behaviorist may decide that my core personality is non-essential because a change of environment will result in a change of my personality. Theoretically, this makes sense except they forgot about a common human characteristic referred to as personal agency or choice. If a theory can claim that helplessness is learned, then it must be logical to claim the opposite idea personal choice is used when the person chooses to be helpless, or helpful.
Cognitive theorists assume that a person’s thoughts drive their behaviors. If a person has learned that they will physically suffer from a lack of food, then hunger will evoke anxiety which will in turn require a person to use their learned behavior which will ensure they will eat soon. Behaviorists can pretend cognition is non essential but cognition is non essential if it produces no behaviors. Thus, Cognitive-Behavioral theorists have come to light.

Here's my husband and me working hard to put the emotion aside and work through the incorrect beliefs I have about my teenager who was behaving very poorly. Dialectics gave me the skills to seperate my immediate anger from my irrational belief that she purposefully strives so hard to punish me. This one worked out well. I was able to accept that this was just poor choices of her own in that moment. I was able to validate how she was feeling and end up enjoying the evening rather than the alternative temper tantrum in public.

Dialectic Behavioral Therapy taught me how to access the thoughts I have about an event and then consult my emotions before I choose the behavior I will display. The Army taught me to shoot to kill and wait for someone else to ask questions. DBT/CBT taught me to validate the person I wish to kill and seek out a middle path rather than, “killing em all and letting God sort em out”.

A person is immediately subjected to many things from the time they are conceived within a mother’s womb. By the time the child is three, they have formed expectations about love and attachment. By the time they are five years old, they have learned specific behaviors that allow them to get their needs for love, attachment, security and comfort met. Regardless of whether the needs a person feels are appropriate, and with equal disregard to the success of the behaviors, some theorists believe that a process is taking place. Each person has an environment that is constantly changing and affecting their life. When the different events occur, a person observes the event, attaches a belief (or a schema) to the event and registers an emotional bond to the event. The emotional bond seems to allow the person quicker access to previously assimilated coping methods for the event they are faced with that has similar circumstances. It seems that the language-based articulation of an event takes a lot of time and energy therefore, as a human; I find that I feel an emotional connectivity long before I can access the belief I have about my outcomes from the event.



This last image is amazing for a couple of reasons. For me, it sums up Nature vs. Nurture with no words spoken. This is me and my oldest daughter. She was adopted this past February however has been in my care for six years. The family resemblance is uncanny even though I am not her biological mother. Everywhere we go, people tell me that we look so much alike.

I am a PsychoAnalytical (nightmare) Dream come true!

Psychoanalytical theorists note that a person’s core personality is developed and stabilized at a relatively young age. Freud would assume my successful adult personality is a byproduct of the successful completion of his psychosexual stage theory. Success would be determined by a lack of fixation within either the oral, anal or phallic stages. Freud postulated that small amounts of psychic energy are used up while passing through these early childhood stages. If a person completes these stages rather than fixating upon the intense pleasure of the stage, then a healthy personality will develop. However, fixation will cause the excessive use of psychic energy and without the maximum amounts of psychic energy; the adult personality will appear malformed. It is easy to validate many aspects of Freud’s Psychosexual Stage theory because it is easy to observe how traumatic experiences in early childhood do indeed manifest in many unconscious character traits.
However, I am not strong because I have found successes in the earliest stages of my life. I have found strength in both the acknowledgment and dismissal of victimization. I was severely abused and neglected. While everyone must experience the trauma involved with the completion of developmental stages, I experienced the perversion of the early stages. As a small child I suffered from ambiguous attachments to deprivation of many basic human needs such as food, love, safety and sometimes shelter. I suffered a traumatic brain injury at two years old in which the latent affect is solely physical; I am going blind.
It would seem that Freud might postulate that my strength has manifested because I successfully deny and repress trauma. I would argue that denial implies that I do not admit these events and repression assumes that I cannot articulate these traumas because they are not within my conscious thoughts. However, they are present in many of my dreams therefore, valid.
Sigmund Freud might even have thought I am strong because my well-developed ego has mastered defense mechanisms such as sublimation and displacement. Rather than sucking up precious physic energy by constantly repressing trauma, I found socially acceptable outlets to channel my dangerous id impulses. He would say that my work as a child advocate and foster parent are signs of sublimation because these are socially acceptable ways to vent undesirable emotions. I can engage anger and confrontational impulses in the defense of someone who cannot defend themselves. He would say I became an Army soldier and Veteran of Foreign Wars in an attempt to redirect rage and contempt toward an enemy that can justifiably be harmed.
I wouldn't agree with him. I would accuse him of an over-active need to make excuses. He would then, assess my defunct personality as unmanageable and solicit a prior authorization for a frontal lobotomy; thus, relieving me and society of my dysfunction.




Besides, Have you ever seen the inside of a can of "Whoop-Ass"? This picture very much resembles how I feel about me on the inside.

I am not a Drama Queen…I merely evolved.

Evolutionary Personality theorists would view my intensely emotional, highly neurotic personality as a success to the evolution-based theory because not only have I survived thus far, but I have survived beautifully. The Evolutionary Personality Theory spins off of the biological premise of Natural Selection. Charles Darwin postulated that if we are to survive, then we must evolve or develop physical characteristics that allow us greater control over the surrounding environment. It is suggested that humans need to develop psychological mechanisms which allow us to manage common human problems. Two human conditions which seem to affect many people negatively are Social Exclusion and Anxiety, the fear that develops from the idea that we may be excluded from a desired group or relationship.
As a young child and along my journey through adolescence, I was physically awkward, cross-eyed, socially inept and emotionally imbalanced. I also found that my family remained willing to constantly remind me of these characteristics. I was raised in the backwoods of Maryland in a socially depressed community along with over a dozen siblings and any transient person my parents decided to welcome into our home. I observed the immediate effects of parental neglect and the latent affects of social inadequacy. When I was reaching adolescence, my family moved to an upper classed neighborhood in Phoenix, Arizona. I found that my feral behavior and disregard for the social community, was not copacetic with survival. I was always in trouble. I didn’t understand certain social constructs such as morality in appearance, thought and actions. I found that I was quickly rejected by many people because I was a threat to their community. Therefore, I found it was time to evolve. My immediate family suffered from a culturally impoverished mindset and quickly rejected my desires for greater community acceptance. The saying, “misery loves company” became apparent.
Through a series of triumphs and failures, moments of inclusion and blatant rejections, I found a greater quality of life from certain psychological mechanisms. The times when I experienced exclusion from schools, churches and social events created a great amount of depression within me. I learned that the anxiety that developed from the fear of rejection was enough of a motivator to propel me toward survival. I didn’t want to die. I didn’t want to fail. I certainly didn’t want to go back to the life where I came from. Anxiety is often assessed as a negative emotion. I have learned that no person has any negative emotions, only emotions that are misused and uncontrolled. Anxiety fueled my determination to reject behaviors that were harmful to me. Today, that same anxiety propels me to succeed in College, to confront negativity and to spit in the face of anything I perceive as detrimental to my survival. I’ve learned to engage in conversations that are appropriate to the environment. I have learned that education is the only thing I take with me when I die. I have learned that adhering to a set of standards, thoughts or emotional responses are all effective means for creating an environment in which I would die from a failure to thrive.
Charles Darwin might claim that my short stature, subpar vision and disproportionately low center of gravity are all physical reasons that I will not fare well in the race for survival. However, he may also find that my quick wit, intellectual motivation and community-oriented social needs are all valid arguments to why I will continue to thrive long after my physical evolution has stunted me.

To be Strong, we must acknowledge weakness

I become stronger because I have weaknesses that I can master. Here is a short video which demonstrates my intense irrational fear of spiders. This funny little excerpt shows how my strength has manifested within my children who use it to help me through my weaknesses. I have the world's most irrational fear of spiders. Freud would love that. Life's greatest moments are impromptu... Ignore the mess!

Central Traits

Strength is my central characteristic and it is of a unique sort. Unlike many characteristics which appear relatively stable throughout the lifespan, strength must be used and conditioned perpetually if it is to remain strong. When I encounter a situation that is hard, I do not ask God to remove this obstacle from my path, rather I ask for the tools to successfully move through it. Strength seems to be a major umbrella for other traits that I display consistently.
Because I am strong, I am confident. My confidence allows me the strength to endure all of life’s challenges. My strong endurance enables me perseverance through the intensity of my neurotic temperament. My intense neuroticism or emotionality, allows me to provide abundant comfort, support, nurturance and protection to those in my care. Those in my care become strong because they can draw strength from me until they are able to stand on their own. Their acceptance and contentment with life rejuvenates my strength because it is the overt proof that I am integral to a greater plan and purpose.

Five Sources & Never the Same Mixture

Traits can be thought of as Dispositions that I hold which I have formed because of the Nature of my surroundings and the Nurture I have received in this Life. Many theorize that we all have the same human dispositions however the amounts we have are uniquely varied. Gordon Allport would nod favorably at my claims that my personality is fluid and alive. Indeed, my personality is as alive as every other living thing on this Earth and I am changing as I grow.
Henry Murray presented a list of 27 psychogenic needs that I have formed into a specific hierarchy that is the essential to the being of Me. He recognized that how other’s view Me is subjective and dependent upon my readiness to respond to a given situation. Furthermore, he postulates that my hierarchy is prioritized upon my internal needs. He may have agreed with my philosophy that I will ultimately spend my time doing that which is most important to Me.
Psychogenic Needs are within us all and I see each as a different colorful bead that is manipulated by the environment and the viewer. You may see that I have strong needs for Understanding, Exhibition, Achievement or Affiliation. If it were Henry Murray, he would feel I am drawing on these psychogenic traits in order to fulfill my desire for Achievement in my studies.
Who I am can be a sharp contrast to the person I am perceived to be. Perception is based within an observer’s emotions. To Me, I am forthright and honest. To You, I may be perceived as aggressive and harsh. Quite possibly, if emotion were to be extracted from perception, we may all contain a set of source traits. Researchers such as Raymond Cattell felt that I have Ten of these source traits, however, many current indications suggest I consist of five traits that cover the currents of Me in the OCEAN of human personality traits.
I exist upon a continuum of Neuroticism because I have thresholds for personal adjustment and emotional stability. My early life was chaos and I spent many years refining survival skills that required constant adjustment to the unknown. I have found emotional stability within many defense mechanisms. In this moment, I have found peace and have adjusted to a level of normalcy that I have set and I have come to embrace my emotional labiality because I want to cherish every emotion for what it is. I am quite high in the Neuroticism Category.
Interaction with this life is unavoidable and because of my desires and goals, I exist high on the Extraversion continuum. I have chosen to partake of a traditional marriage rich with children, community, religion and education. This choice in this moment has required that I develop strong interpersonal relationships, refined social skills and well developed optimism and assertion. At this moment in my existence, I remain highly extraverted so that I can be who I want to be.
Nature is inevitable and quite possibly the charm in my kaleidoscope that radiates my disposition to intellect or Openness. I once heard that intelligence is seen in one’s willingness to consider new ideas without judgment. I have found that I thrive on symmetry, familiarity and consistency. But, when I am comfortable, I am creative, innovative, colorful and imaginative. I am no artist but I find beauty in most things. I find that I am open to new ideas as long as my physical needs for safety, health and family are not jeopardized. I am mid-range on the Openness continuum because I am protective of the safety, love and connectedness that I have created away from the chaotic unknowns of my origins.
Agreeableness is a very subjective trait continuum that I am still exploring. I feel that I rate high in this characteristic unless I perceive you as a danger ~ or my Dentist. I have experienced many times where I have succumbed rather than agreed to the environmental conditions because it was best for the greater good. In this moment, I try to be helpful and I physically force myself to try trust before suspicion. I consider myself as docile and soft-hearted as a mother bear. As long as I do not perceive the threat to my cubs, then I am agreeable. However, I am ruthless to that which threatens my existence. I live by the promise that I will never point a gun at you unless it is my complete intention to kill you. Therefore, circumstantially speaking, I am agreeable.
The fifth dimension of my personality within the trait theory is centered somewhere along the Conscientiousness continuum. I am well organized, careful, conscientious and efficient. I have progressively found comfort higher along this continuum. As I mature, I am moving away from a willfulness attitude and striving toward a greater willingness to work for what I desire. I feel I am existent at a level that no longer needs validation or outside judgment. I am incredibly content with my ability to work and willingness to achieve.

Traits as Facets

I am colorful, dynamic, constantly changing and inertia is propelling me toward my future and eternity. I am multi-faceted and as I move and change, the light that shines through Me, illuminates a different spectrum to whomever is observing. I am made of the finest materials because I am a child of God. I am His Daughter; therefore, a Princess. I am here for a short amount of time and I am a unique mixture of whatever your traits perceive me to be. I have a core but, I think the core of Being is too pure and rich to articulate and summarize. Trait theorist will continue to create adjectives and classifications until time ends for them. I know that I am today what I have chosen in this moment and like the turning of the kaleidoscope, will never again be this person again.

Personally Speaking...

Personalities are prismatic and multi-faceted. I think of my personality as simplistic and complex as a child’s kaleidoscope. Dependent upon things such as perception, comfort, interpersonal relations and openness, my personality can be as unique among viewers as if each one were passing along the child’s toy and gazing through the colorful beads and sunlight to enjoy their own interpretation of the thing that is: Me.